You can learn a lot from the death of someone you love but you have to be open to it. The finality of death can literally shock your system so you have to heal that first. That shock is something you can never understand even remotely until you have experienced it. You can’t get ready for it. As much as you might try and prepare for it, it doesn’t really soften the blow. Gone is gone and that’s hard to take for us humans.
Eventually the shock has to calm and your road to healing opens up. Take it, no matter how much you fear the pain of it. If you don’t, that initial shock will calm into an entrenched numbness that will encase your life and detach you from the constant offer of life’s fullness. It’s alright to rest in the numbness for a little while, but not forever. You were made for much more than that.
If you step in to the courage you have inside you and tell your grief that you are willing to be its student, then you begin down the path of healing. If you let it, it will take you to the depths of who you are by asking you to look for answers to your life’s biggest questions: who are you at your truest core and why are you here? These are questions that can take your whole lifetime to find the answers to. They are held in your Spirit’s essence and your ego likes to keep you separated from that. The Grand Spirit from which all life comes knows exactly who you are and why you’re here. You are love and you are here to express love.
But the answers are not the goal. Healing comes in the search for them. Living the answers you find as they reveal themselves to you one by one, part by part, is the goal. Commit to that and watch the inherent beauty of your life coming into full bloom from within.